Making Choices and Mind Your Language

For Today......

Credits to Randy Glasbergen (www.glasbergen.com)

and the time for some English lessons, around the world....
(shared via email - copyright, if any, is unknown)

In a Bangkok temple:

IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER, IF DRESSED AS A MAN.

Cocktail lounge , Norway :

LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.

Doctors office, Rome :

SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.

Dry cleaners, Bangkok:

DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS.

In a Nairobi restaurant:

CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER.

On the main road to Mombasa, leaving Nairobi:

TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE.

On a poster at Kencom:

ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO WE CAN HELP.

In a City restaurant:

OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS.

In a cemetery:

PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY, BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES.

Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations:

GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS IN BED.

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:

OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR.

In a Tokyo bar:

SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.

Hotel, Yugoslavia:

THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID.

Hotel, Japan:

YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID.

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:

YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY.

A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest:

IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE.

Hotel, Zurich:

BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE.

Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:

WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?

Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:

WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS. 

A laundry in Rome:

LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME.

Do You Understand English ?

Everyone who says that he/she is a Malaysian citizen, has no excuse whatsoever, not to be fluent in Bahasa Kebangsaan (the National Language), that is Bahasa Melayu. Malaysians will use Bahasa Melayu when interacting with fellow Malaysians. Not only that, every Malaysian citizen must uphold the National Language in accordance to the provisions of the Constitution. Public displays, signage, bill boards, every official and commercial businesses and correspondences, functions etc within this country must use Bahasa Melayu.

A ruling of a court-case states:-

"The supremacy of Bahasa Malaysia or the Malay language in our courts cannot be denied. Article 152 of the Federal Constitution, read together with section 8 of the National Language Act provide that all proceedings, other than the giving of evidence by a witness, in the Federal Court, Court of Appeal, High Court and subordinate court shall be in the national language." (Source : Lawyer Kampung)

Alright, some of the Malaysians will lament .."Oh! what will happen to our  mother tongue. You want to kill our beloved mother tongue..?!!"

Relax bro! We want you to become Malaysians, not kill your mother tongue. Let's hear what Prof. Khoo Kay Kim has to say about this:-

"Mother tongue" is another misunderstood term. It should be the language used by members of a particular family, not the language used by a nation. Therefore, Tamil is not the "mother tongue" of every Indian. The Bengalis, Punjabis, Malayalis and Telegus have their own "mother tongues". In Sarawak and Sabah, the indigenous people have numerous "mother tongues".

Let's move on.

 

English is the second language, here in Malaysia. I would like to say also that it is a "must" for every Malaysian citizen to sufficiently be fluent in English. This second language shall be used when interacting with non-Malaysians as we do not expect non-Malaysians to be well versed or understand Bahasa Melayu (even though many non-Malaysians do really have impeccable command of Bahasa Melayu)

Let us now have some ideas, how important the English Language to us, in our daily lives.

Some images (with credits) from:-
www.engrish.com

 

I am available at next ticket office?

(Upon arrival)

One Flesh Juice to go and err.. alcools, bar tender?

  

Let's try the "TUKEKARA-NOODLE" which is.......

"The noodles of a phantom with the resistance to the teeth of boast of our shop. The exquisite rainy season which repeated trial and error and was completed. Colorful red pepper of Asia. Domestic careful selection pork ........."

Alright! Cancel. NON-HALAL!

 

(Now, let's find this place)

Aarrgghh! Let's find another door please!

 

and be mindful not to let them call the police to lock you up when you are in an elevator..

(Need to attend to nature call first!)

Should I walk backward to go foward ?!

Goshh!! I need a rest!

 

Still could not locate the rest room?

And when you get there, dont forget to...

(whattt??!! yuckksss!!)

No comment (me not a lady)

Gosshh!! I end up in the wrong toilet?

 

You need assistance?

Oh! You can provide me with some assistance....

errr.. what kind of pleasure..?!!

  

Well THANK YOU!! err.. how do I take myself, please? 

 

You mean, one of these CARES?

he..he..he.. what exactly is in your mind right now?...

 

Maybe we should ask this guy for more info?

Did he just mention this? !!

Let's Rock then !!!

 

Hand me the dictionary, please!

 

Oh! Oh! Ok! Understood! Just need a puff break ! Errr.. did you see me "smmmorrkiing"? full of smoke?

O Sinner! Cleanse your soul for you have sinned! Or forever lose your soul!

And pray hard to redeem yourself !!! Do MultiplePrayers at least 3 times !!

 

Do you realise that you have wasted your hard-earned money ?

 Leave this sinful place at once !!

 (at window No. 2 - DUSHH!!) ouch! Whadda.. #%*!@ ?!

(at window No. 3) ooouuuchhhh!!! Again ???!!

(please get a punch at window.. aarrgghh!! %^#*!)

 

Remember your family...

 

The Last Supper

 Dear Lord! I am sitting up straight on this chair to have this last supper. Please command someone to clean the table because I dont think I can do the cleaning after the supper and,

please do not bill my corporation for the cleaning services..!

 

And Dear Lord, let there be no Cheese Fair in this Last Supper for I fear cheese..!!

Though I think many of you have come across this youtube video, I still find this so hilarious that I need to post it here.

Still not convinced on the importance of English?

CLICK HERE

(Read the feature article & see the priceless photo)

(now I can appreciate why these guys are campaigning for the Ministry of Education to revisit the existing education policy with a view to revamp or to improve it further). Please sign this?

Do We Understand Each Other - Part 2

Two things...!!
1. Cannot tahan the itch la.. !
2. Malaysia-Instinct.com
(image credit : Damian Harvey)
For those who do not understand what "cannot tahan" is, it means "cannot stand".

By the tone and setting of this blog, I originally intended to post only articles revolving around Rumi,  M. Nasir and the likes with some occasional weird stuffs which nobody seems wanting to give any comment... hu..! hu..! hu...!

After publishing the previous article, I have got this "socio-politic itch", which normally cured easily when I get my dose from Kenn. (Now you know why I do not have many entries in my blogroll, except for ...L I S T E D !!!.)

(image credit : omy)

Mopiko? Uh! Uh! did not help either..!!!

In my previous article, I wrote about how important to have a common language in order for us to understand each other. Common language is a key to nation building.

Sometime ago, PM Najib, in his 1-Malaysia blog mentioned that tolerance alone is not good enough. There must be acceptance, because tolerance seems to be "conditional" whereas acceptance is more on the basis of "willingness" that is, more on "unconditional". Stuffs like "unconditional love", "giving without expecting anything in return" etc. That is noble.

To reach that level of "acceptance", I think, people go through/experience some kind of process. Perhaps the process (simply to say) would be; people come to learn what is "tolerance" first before they could appreciate what is "acceptance".

But how do people come to learn, to understand and to know what "tolerance" is? Don't you think that people must understand each other first before they could tolerate?

And how could people understand each other when they don't even speak the same language?

hmmmm... not understanding each other means there are misundertandings... which may lead to....? suspicion? distrust? intolerance? non-acceptance?

So... common language is indeed a key to nation building.... common language is one of the tools to unite people.

Anybody has any idea what is the common language for Malaysians?

PM Najib, can you help me here? Well, for one thing I certainly cannot instruct the Minister in charge of press, printings, official communications and correspondences, bill boards, public displays and advertisements, signage, commercial banners etc to mind our own National Language in accordance to the provisions of the Federal Constitution and the Language Act. You have the power PM Najib, including warning the hypocrite-me to stop blogging in English !!! he..he..he...

Wow! my socio-politic itch is gone !!! hurray !!! yea !!!

I will stop right here, right now!
next please !

Kenn informed me that Malaysia-Instinct.com (MIc) has published the article here. Kenn believes MIc has reproduced my previous article titled "Do We Understand Each Other". I think Kenn has some grounds to believe so because:-

1. The same title

2. The last part the article ("Enemy In-sight") was my own experience when I sat for an exam, English paper, very long time ago.

That "Bush-Condi" joke was forwarded to me quite a long time ago (I mentioned "email vault" in my previous post). Save for the images in spicing up the joke, which I sourced from the net, I myself do not know who was the original author of the "Bush-Condi" joke. The author could be one of these (about 829,000) search results, if you google for it.

Oh well, it is not "giving the credit where it is due" that really matters for me in the case, but MIc had just missed to publish the real message that I wanted to get across in the first place! The first part of the article which carried the message "common language is a key to nation building" is what matter more than the "Bush-Condi" joke. If you asked me, MIc should not leave out that part, the real message!. Maybe in this case, MIc should get some advice from Kembara Politik, who did it right when he/she wrote:-

"Gelak, gelak juga... tapi pengajarannya kenalah ambil"

(Enjoy the laughs... but do take heed of the lesson as well)

More examples to do it right, perhaps, here, here and here, where all of them had mentioned the source (by giving proper credit), where the materials are being sourced from.

I just want to spread the words which are quite similar to what blogger.com caution us whenever we want to make use of something which do not belong to us. I too, want to keep on reminding myself on this.

Blogger.com says this:-

"Remember: Using others' images on the web without their permission may be bad manners, or worse, copyright infringement."

MIc also have this at the bottom of their page, haven't they?
"Copyright © 2009 Malaysia-instinct.com All Rights Reserved."

Help me to spread the words here MIc, maybe one day Jebat Must Die will find it appropriate to list MIc in his/her blogroll as requested by one commentator named pj Moorthy. Let us contribute a little something to help maintain the high level of ethic. Indirectly, I am promoting/marketing Malaysia-Instinct.com, am I not Mr. pj Moorthy? Anyway, Kenn has listed Malaysia-Instinct.com in his ...L I S T E D !!! (check out the section titled "NEWSROOM", pj Moorthy!)

UPDATE 17/11/2009 : Kenn has delisted MIc from ...LISTED !!!

Okay, the two things are done! No more itch!

Before I sign off, I would like to "market" something too.. he...he...he...

1. If you like any part of this blog, please thank me by signing this petition here. To learn more, click the logo at the side bar, above which it says "To build a nation, build a school - Tagore"

2. I want to thank Kenn too. Kenn needs your voice to support the call for "Single Stream Schools". Click here.

Now, should I or should I not stick on to just Rumi, M. Nasir, weird stuff and the likes all the times  from now on ?

Do We Understand Each Other?

Gosh! I love music !!!. Music speaks to many, but with a language only unique to one! Many hear, one listens! Oh! Let us get our feet firmly down to the ground now...

Sometimes, when we speak to each other, even when using the same, common language of the tongue, there still bound to be misunderstandings. What more if we were to speak in different languages ? That is why it is very important to have a single, common National Language. Common language is the key to Nation building.

We want to understand each other, don't we?

Enjoy this, another one from my email vault.. he..he..he..

Hu Jintao was named chief of the Communist Party in China.
image credit : mirzaee

SCENE: The Oval Office. George Bush and Condolezza Rice.

image credit : imageenvision

George: Condi! Nice to see you? What''s happening?

Condi: Sir, I have the report about the new leader of China.

George: Great. Let's hear it.

Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.

George: That's what I want to know.

Condi: That's what I'm telling you.

George: That's what I''m asking you? Who is the new leader of China?

Condi: Yes.

George: I mean the fellow's name.

Condi: Hu.

George: The guy in China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The new leader of China.

Condi: Hu?

George: The Chinese?

Condi: Hu is leading China.

George: Now whaddya?asking me for?

Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.

George: Well,I'm asking you. Who is leading China?

Condi: That's the man's name.

George: That's whose name?

Condi: Yes.

George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?

Condi: Yes sir.

George: Yassir? You mean Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.

Condi: That's correct.

George: Then who is in China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir is in China?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Then who is?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. On the phone. I bet he knows.

Condi: Kofi?

George: No, thanks.

Condi: You want Kofi?

George: No.

Condi: You don't want Kofi.

George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N.

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.

Condi: Kofi?

George: No, milk! Will you please make the call?

Condi: Call who?

George: Who is the guy at the U.N .?

Condi: Hu is the guy in China.

George: Will you stay out of China?!

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: and stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N!

Condi: Kofi?

George: all right! Light with sugar. Now get on the phone.

image credit : schooldistrict20

(Condi picks up the phone.)

Condi: Rice here.

George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too.

And perhaps that was how Mr. George Bush reached some of the decisions during his tenure as the President of U.S.A.

And if I remember it correct, this one was a part of an exam's question, long time ago :-

An army base camp commander received specific order from the H.Q.'s Commanding Officer to report any activity of the enemy prior to taking any action. This was during the Japanese invasion of Malaya.

The scout unit spotted the movements of Japanese's soldiers and went back to the camp to report. Upon getting the information, the base Commander promptly radioed the H.Q., informing:-

"Enemy in-sight, Sir !"

After a short while, the H.Q. issued an order for the base Commander to retreat to Singapore, abandoning the camp by burning everything, not letting the enemy to make use any of the facilities or supplies left behind.

Even though puzzled by the order, the base Commander went ahead to carry out the order.

Only much later that  the base Commander learned the H.Q.'s Commanding Officer thought he had heard this:-

"Enemy inside, Sir !"